


Injections

by heckmedic



Series: TF2 Oneshots [3]
Category: Team Fortress 2
Genre: M/M, Trans Character, mentions of needles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-30
Updated: 2016-03-30
Packaged: 2018-05-29 22:21:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,716
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6396205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heckmedic/pseuds/heckmedic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Soldier asks Medic if he can help him with his transition (and I write shitty summaries)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Injections

Soldier was not afraid of Medic. Not like the other men of the team were. He never flinched when the German approached him, bloody and spattered with gore, or turned him away when Medic needed a guinea pig. If anything, Medic was probably his favourite team mate. He didn’t act all high and mighty like Spy did, and he made a hell of a lot more sense in conversations than Pyro (but not much.) He was also useful and strong, both as a team member and in general. Soldier liked that. Everyone else he'd ever met had in some way turned out to be unreliable. He could never depend on them. Medic, however, was different.

They’d started off on the wrong foot, intially. Soldier had refused to take off his shirt for a standard medical exam.

“Don’t you come one step closer!” Soldier had warned lowly, cords standing out in his neck. The effect was ruined somewhat when his voice broke half way through. Medic had the decency to look perplexed, but he took a step back anyway and that was what mattered.

The examination table bit into the back of Soldier’s thighs. It was cold and hard and the Infirmary smelt funny. It wasn’t nice and bright like the place back home had been, but then again he wasn’t paying money to be there. He’d been hired by RED before he could finish his course of treatment there. At least he didn't have to worry about paying back that loan to the mobsters anymore.

He was very concerned that the lack of those last few injections was noticeable.

“Ach, fine. But, may I ask what is the problem here?”

Soldier gritted his teeth and stared steadfastly at the wall. Medic tsked and tapped a nail against the metal end of the stethoscope hung around his neck. “Well. If that is how you wish to be, I shall have to sedate you-”

“No, wait.” A low, desperate plea. Sweat ran down Soldier’s spine. “If...If I hold that thing up to my chest, do you promise not to make me take off my shirt?”

It was an odd request and Medic couldn’t see the logic in it, but Administration wanted initial reports and he had a schedule to keep. With suspicion and curiosity, he presented the end of the stethoscope. Soldier took it with surprising care and a moment later reached up under his shirt to press it to the skin over his sternum. He hissed at the cold of it, but Medic had put the earplugs in and was listening intently. Silence reigned in the Infirmary and gradually, Soldier calmed down.

“Take a deep breath, bitte....And out again. Wunderbar.”

Medic gestured for the end of the stethoscope and Soldier wordlessly returned it, dropping his shirt back down quickly and hoping Medic hadn’t seen too much of his stomach. Soldier watched the other man carefully as he noted down Soldier’s heart rate and some other figures in designated boxes on a form. Unexpectedly, he glanced up and Soldier, embarassed at having been caught looking, snapped his gaze back to the wall. Medic regarded him cooly for a moment; Soldier could hear him tapping a pencil on the side of his clipboard. It was clear he wanted to say something and oh, God, he knew, of course he fucking did, and now he’d be fired and have to slink home again-

“That will be all, Soldier, danke.”

Shocked, Soldier turned round, jaw working as he struggled for something to say. Medic must’ve seen the look on his face, because he made an attempt to look supportive, taking his glasses off and polishing them on the snowy hem of his lab coat.

“Have you told anyone on the team about yourself yet, Soldier? And I do not mean about your hometown or favourite colour.”

“Wait, how did you-”

“A few things. Voice mainly. However, I will not notify Administration unless you ask. Your secret is safe with me.”

Soldier swallowed uneasily as he watched Medic return his glasses to his face. His voice was small and quiet when he asked;

“Doctor-patient confidentiality?”

Medic smiled. “Doctor-patient confidentiality.”

Nodding to himself, Soldier hopped off the examination table, tucking his shirt back in after. He wasn't sure he trusted Medic, but he had no choice, and he could think of nothing the doctor might get out of breaking his promise. He excused himself from the Infirmary and later, when it was dark and he could stand in front of the mirror safely, he stood up straight and studied the silhouetted line of his soldiers, the bulges of his calves and biceps.

He definitely needed more.

A few days later, he found the oppurtunity to ask Medic if he thought it could be done. The doctor kept unusual meal times and Soldier himself was a creature of rigorous habit; a slice of toast ten minutes after waking up and two more plus bacon and an egg at 7 AM. When he saw Medic going into the kitchen to get more cereal at 7:15, he forced himself to break habit and pretend he was going to get more food. The kitchen smelt of coffee and cigarette smoke; familliar and comforting. The din of the mess hall was muffled by the door and Medic didn’t notice Soldier coming in until he had cleared his throat.

“Hey, uh, Doc-”

“Ja, Soldier?”

The room was suddenly too hot, and the whirring of the coffee machine too noisy. Sweat beaded on Soldier’s brow and he found himself wringing his hands, wishing they looked as strong as they felt. It wasn’t fair! Medic was taller than him, and his voice was deeper even if he did have a stupid accent, and he probably never had trouble finding clothes that fit him. Medic fixed him with that weird doctor look again, the same as he given Soldier in the Infirmary. Soldier felt those eyes appraising him, posing questions, noting things down-

It wasn’t fair.

He knew, of course, and had for some time. It was the bandages he’d noticed first. The stretchy kind that he used for compressing fast-bleeding wounds. He was losing whole rolls of it, and Scout wasn’t the culprit-his hands were always wrapped in white. After that, he’d noted that Soldier never showered with the rest of them, keeping strange times when he could have the room to himself. It was the issue with the stethoscope that had caused everything to fall into place.

He had only met two other men like Soldier. One had been an aquaintance in University (and an excellent source of more potent and unusual drugs he required for his research) and the second had been a client in the first of many unamed clinics. Sensing that Soldier was still looking for his words, Medic turned away and fussed with the coffee machine. Relieved of the burden of that cool grey gaze upon him, Soldier finally found breath to speak.

“I-uh-didn’t mean to be awkward a few days ago. For the medical, I mean.” he forced himself to take a breath and focus on the depth of his voice again, “but I couldn’t risk Administration figuring out that-that I’m not like I said I was.”

They had turned him away when he went to sign up. Smiled softly at his just-cut hair and the overly-affected swagger of his steps. He still had to catch himself from sitting too neatly and closed-up when he tried to sign the forms and he hadn’t known what name to put. The real laughter had come at the Jane he’d left on the dotted line, and the sock that had tumbled out of his pant leg when he got up. He hadn’t hung around to hear the rest of it-at least the door had slammed nicely on his way out and the guys waiting outside had flinched even if it was only at the noise.

He didn’t want to have to slam another door like that. Not again.

“I-I need to know if you can get hold of something for me. A-uh-drug. I guess.”

“And what might that be?” Medic replied cooly, stirring two sugars into his coffee. Soldier stood up straighter on the other side of the kitchen, hoped there was something steely in his doll-blue eyes.

“Injections. Nothing illegal, if you’re worried about the requisitions.”

“Testosterone, ja? Don’t look surprised, Soldier. I told you earlier I wasn’t going to let this get out of hand.”

“So...You can get it? Without Administration knowing it’s for me?”

Caution was not a tone that suited Soldier; it made his throat hurt more than anything else. Medic looked as nonchalant as ever as he leaned a hip on the countetop and sipped his coffee. Soldier would never admit it, but he desperately wanted to cultivate the same look and air Medic had about him. Powerful and in control, but undeniably masculine. A force to be reckoned with, whether armed or unarmed.

Rakish and goodlooking, even without stubble on his jaw.

“Of course. They rarely ask what I need my materials for, exactly. They...Understand my, how to say, _unusual_ requirements.”

Soldier was unsure of what to say to that, so he diverted his gaze towards the blinds partially open over the window, and the slats of bright blue the showed through between them.

“If I place the requisition now, I can get it here in about a week. How much do you need?”

“Not-Not all of it. There was, uh, a place I was going. Before RED, I mean. They started a course of treatment or something there.”

“How long were you going for?”

“About two months.”

Medic nodded and had another sip of coffee. At some point in the last two minutes, Soldier had begun to feel more at ease. This was better than anything he could have expected; he’d thought Medic was going to blow the whistle on him anyway, just to stay on Administration’s good side. He found himself both unable and unwilling to restrain the crooked smile that spread on his face.

“Thanks, Doc. I mean it.”

“It was never a problem, Soldier. Come and see me Friday of next week, and we shall see what can be done about your medication.”

**Author's Note:**

> I will always headcannon soldier as trans and no-one can stop me.
> 
> ~Leon
> 
> Like what you've read? [Please consider leaving me a tip!](http://www.paypal.me/heckmedic)


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